ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT

Foster stages assault on World Rugby headquarters

BY Jack Tunney  ·  Saturday Aug 6, 2022

Following New Zealand’s loss to South Africa in the opening game of their Rugby Championship, Ian Foster has attempted to take control of the World Rugby governing body in an effort to keep hold of the All Blacks world stature.

ADVERTISEMENT

With rumours circulating that there could very well be a further drop in the world rankings for the men in black, Foster has had no choice but to go and stop it at the source. Armed with Ardie Savea at the rear, and his two brand spanking new assistants at his side, Foster has forced his way into the headquarters.

Rudely ignoring the polite welcoming by the building receptionist, Foster stormed straight through, pressing floor number 65 on the elevator. Straight to the top went the team of determined All Blacks.

Foster could be forgiven for his expectations that the chief executive, the top dog, the ruler, would be hailing from the skies. In actual fact, he had missed the correct floor by all of 38 levels and had actually landed amongst the bewildered finance department.

Undeterred by leading the attack the wrong way (not for the first time), Foster has taken ahold of a very confused and quite frankly bewildered accounts division in what will no doubt become known as ‘doing a Foster’ for many moons to come.

Foster has made his demands clear, give New Zealand the number 1 spot back, give them the 2023 World Cup trophy, and to take back his P45.

Rumour has it Rassie Erasmus is currently underway recording a 5-hour video on why the All Blacks cheated their way to the 1987 World Cup victory, currently titled ‘Rassie makes it about Rassie, again’.

ADVERTISEMENT

This situation is still live, more to follow.

*Obviously satire, Foster would never put in so much effort.

Related Articles

  • 33 WEEKS AGO

    World Cup winner to return after year long...

  • 34 WEEKS AGO

    Rugby league golden boot star set for huge...

  • 50 WEEKS AGO

    Hurricanes miss the memo as New Zealand clubs...



ADVERTISEMENT

Great Tries

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Harlequins winger heralded as the next big England breakthrough after weekend's performance

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    WATCH: Christian Wade secures incredible HATRICK in just second match back in the Gallagher Premiership

  • 3 WEEKS AGO

    Results: Another exciting weekend of international rugby complete

  • 4 WEEKS AGO

    WATCH: South African schoolboy leaves defenders clutching at ghosts

  • 4 WEEKS AGO

    WATCH: Innovative Springboks score incredible trick try vs the All Blacks

View All

Big Hits & Dirty Play

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    South African school boy makes the greatest tackle ever

  • 2 WEEKS AGO

    Huge guillotine tackle divides fans in viral footage

  • 2 WEEKS AGO

    Fans call for Stuart Hogg to face punishment after altercation involving ball boy

  • 4 WEEKS AGO

    Leigh Halfpenny given harsh welcome to English rugby

  • 8 WEEKS AGO

    Fight kicks off between parents and players in South African school boy match

View All

See It To Believe It

  • 1 DAY AGO

    Next big Scotland star completes IMPOSSIBLE tackle to win his side the match

  • 5 DAYS AGO

    Antoine Dupont’s latest side quest

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Cameraman dives for the line and squirrel goes looking for Leicester opener in hilarious scenes during Bath match

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Black Ferns STUNNED by Ireland while Kildunne WONDER TRY helps England take victory over USA

  • 1 WEEK AGO

    WATCH: Christian Wade secures incredible HATRICK in just second match back in the Gallagher Premiership

View All

Funnies

  • 4 DAYS AGO

    Siya Kolisi recalls ultimate 'bro moment' with Eben Etzebeth

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Cameraman dives for the line and squirrel goes looking for Leicester opener in hilarious scenes during Bath match

  • 2 WEEKS AGO

    Rokoduguni scores as debate rages over validity of five point penalty kick

  • 6 WEEKS AGO

    Owen Farrell spotted in Paris committing hard to life with Racing 92

  • 7 WEEKS AGO

    'Who is that guy?!' - US sports commentator in awe of Springbok star

View All

Amateur

  • 91 WEEKS AGO

    You Won’t See Many Better Than This Silky-Smooth Try From Llandovery RFC

  • 91 WEEKS AGO

    Incredible Scenes As Caldy RFC Hand Ealing First Championship Defeat Of The Season

  • 114 WEEKS AGO

    Dubious Score Decides Result Of Rugby's Biggest Schools Fixture

  • 114 WEEKS AGO

    Incredible Scenes At School Boys Rugby Match

  • 114 WEEKS AGO

    The Next Dominant Backrow?

View All

Player Features

  • 1 DAY AGO

    Next big Scotland star completes IMPOSSIBLE tackle to win his side the match

  • 2 DAYS AGO

    A return to the England squad for Saracens star after six years in the wilderness

  • 3 DAYS AGO

    Marcus Smith removed from position amid injury crisis

  • 5 DAYS AGO

    Antoine Dupont’s latest side quest

  • 6 DAYS AGO

    Harlequins winger heralded as the next big England breakthrough after weekend's performance

View All